Frequently Asked Questions

Office locations?

The Boulder Healing Hub1650 38th Street, Suite 100EBoulder, CO 80301

ALSO: NE Longmont Location


What are your office hours?

I see clients Tuesday through Sunday, including evenings. Weekend hours are available when I am not teaching a couple’s weekend retreat.

How long/close together are sessions?

I do sessions that are two hours in length for couples. This mini-intensive allows you to each have a chance to express, hear and understand each other’s feelings and needs on the issue we are addressing.

Then we work on solutions to the issue so that you leave with a sense of clarity and closure until our next session.

Couples usually meet weekly for the first few sessions, and then spread it out to every other week to allow for more home practice in between.

Do you have a free initial consultation to get acquainted?

I offer a free 30-minute consultation, either in person or online.

In the consultation, you can tell me what you are each looking for and a little bit about your background and history. It is also a time to ask me any questions you might have. I will listen and let you know honestly how I think I can help. Or if I don’t think I am the right person for you, I will refer you to someone who is.

Do you take insurance?

I am not in-network for any insurance company, but I will gladly provide you with an invoice which you can present if your company reimburses for out-of-network providers. If you have a separate out-of-network deductible, our sessions can help reduce it.

Do you have a sliding scale?

I do not offer a sliding scale for private counseling. If you have a restricted budget, I am open to working out a payment plan with you. I can also offer partial scholarships and payment plans for our weekend retreats, which are much more cost-effective and give you a month of follow-up support.

How do I set up an initial appointment?

For the quickest response, call me at (303) 946-6030 and leave a message with: 1) Which location you prefer, and 2) A few times that you would be able to meet over the next few weeks. I’ll get back to you to confirm a time. You can also email me at Robin@RelatingwithHeart.com or use the contact form below.

What is your cancellation policy?

If you cancel with less than 24 hours’ notice, the charge is $50 the first time and $100 for subsequent cancellations. If there is an unforeseen situation outside of your control, such as illness or babysitters not showing up, this can be waived. Please notify me as much in advance as possible.

Who do you work with?

I focus on helping couples and family members to get along and truly enjoy their lives together. I specialize in helping couples in any stage of relationship, from initial dating, pre-marital, married/committed, divorced and second/subsequent marriages.

In addition to couples, I can support family members in opening up an authentic and constructive channel of communication to bring them closer together. This includes adult family members such as siblings or adult children/teens and their parent(s), as well as family groups.

The same methods work well with business partners who are in a committed relationship with one another and could use a little help ironing some things out.

What age range?

All ages in a family group; however, if it is just two people in a session, the tools I offer work best if the child is 12 or older.

What happens in a session?

You will sit facing each other (not me), and I will help you to take turns being the Speaker and the Listener so that both people have the opportunity to be in both roles.

I will provide you with a guide to help you both communicate directly, honestly and effectively so that your partner wants to listen and can express his/her empathy for you.

After both of you feel heard, we will brainstorm possible solutions and then work toward negotiating agreements that work for both of you. I write down those requests and agreements so that you can take them home and remind yourself throughout the week about the new approach you have decided to try.

Do you give assignments in between sessions?

Yes, I will give you simple, powerful practices to take home and implement with each other to build trust and connection, as well as ones to address difficulties that come up. These tools can also be applied with children, extended family, friends and at work.

What is your professional training and experience?

I have been in private practice with couples for over 25 years. Before that I worked with high-risk teens and their families.

It has been my privilege to work with over 1000 couples, both privately and in the educational programs and retreats that I teach with my husband Michael.

As a PAIRS Master Teacher and Trainer, I brought the PAIRS program to Colorado 25 years ago. PAIRS (Practical Application of Intimate Relationship Skills) was the first and most comprehensive program in emotional literacy for couples (see www.PAIRS.com for more info).

I have trained and certified in a dozen other modalities which include Gestalt Therapy, Psychodrama, Emotionally Focused Couples therapy,  Imago, and I am a Certified Trauma Therapist. However, I believe that my most relevant experience has come from our 25-year marriage (which is a second marriage for both of us). We have dealt with overwhelming challenges and stressors that often tear marriages apart.

In addition to my two master’s degrees, I have co-authored several chapters in text books on relationships. Yet what qualifies me most to help you is that my husband and I have practiced, applied, developed and taught what we have learned over the past 25 years.

I personally understand the struggles that couples go through, and know how to take you through the most difficult of times to a better place together if you have the desire to heal and grow as a couple.

But if you want specifics:

Contributing Author

Certifications

  • The Gestalt Institute of Denver
  • The Family Therapy Training Center of Colorado
  • Boulder Psychotherapy Institute (Betty Cannon, Ph.D.)
  • Imago and Gestalt Relationship Therapy (Jaylynne Chase-Jacobsen, LCSW)
  • Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (Sue Johnson, Ph.D.)
  • Couples’ Relationship Enhancement Program (Bernard Guerney, Ph.D.)
  • Certified Trauma Specialist
  • Interpersonal Communication Instructor Levels I and II (Sherod Miller Ph.D.)
  • The Enneagram Institute – Psychic Structures and the Superego (Russ Hudson)
  • PAIRS Master Teacher and Trainer—Training and certifying leaders under the auspices of PAIRS Foundation, including psychologists, clergy and social workers, military and lay chaplains (US Navy and Marine Corps)

Education
BA Psychology: Princeton University
MA Humanistic and Transpersonal Psychology: University of Redlands
Masters of Social Work: University of Denver

Awards

  • Denver Family Institute Alumni of the Year
  • Dorothea Spellman Award from the University of Denver
    Graduate School of Social Work
What if we are doing pretty well together? Will counseling be valuable?

The main thing I hear couples tell me is, “If only I had learned this sooner – what a difference it would have made!”

The best time to learn new ways of relating is when you are in a good place together and not in distress. That’s when your brain is most receptive. 

So, yes, it’s great to learn how to deal with differences, resolve conflicts and prevent the breakdown of intimacy when you are in a good place together! And if you are not, it will help as well.

Do you see the individuals in a couple separately?

Sometimes it is helpful to start by meeting each of you individually. We can discuss what you want and need to see change, as well as some of your personal history.

This is an option, not required. Occasionally it can be helpful to check in with each of you privately as well.

In order to maintain balance, I will not do individual therapy with someone who is part of a couple that I am working with. I will help refer you to an individual therapist if that is appropriate for things like trauma and substance use issues.

What kinds of modalities do you use?

My own eclectic blend of all the methods I have studied and my own relationship experience.

We uncover your emotional allergies from the past; utilize powerful communication and conflict resolutions tools; and focus on specific, measurable solutions to the problems you are dealing with.

See “What happens in a session” and “What is your professional training and experience” for more details.

What does a client need to know to get the most out of working with you?

One thing I will ask of you is to take responsibility and avoid blaming one another.

You may not yet understand your part; but if you are not open to learning what that is and prefer to place all the blame on your partner, then our progress will be slow.

Let me know if either one of you has decided that you really are done and do not want to invest in working further on the relationship. We can then focus on letting go with respect and dignity.

This also applies if you are emotionally involved with another person to the point that your heart is no longer in your relationship with your partner.

Practicing the tools I send home with you will accelerate your progress so that you will make surprising and rapid changes in long-standing patterns.

What if we live out of town?

We can meet initially online; if we decide to work together, we can do sessions online for a period of time.

It will be important to find a time to work together in-person, either for a Basic True Love Weekend or a Couple’s Private Intensive of 12 hours over the course of a few days. Both together will bring rapid transformation and clarity. Then we can follow up with online sessions for support and maintenance of the changes you have made.

Is it your bias to keep people together?

My job is to help the two of you speak authentically and honestly about your feelings and needs with one another – then to support you in determining if the changes your partner wants to see are things that you can/want to do.

Sometimes it is too late for one of you to try to work on the relationship. And sometimes there are important values or lifestyle differences that make it unlikely that you will be happy together.

I don’t know what is best for the two of you, but I will create an environment where you can speak the truth, with love, and find clarity together.

My promise is to help you get off the fence and not remain stuck in an unhappy situation. Yet I have seen, more often than not, that challenges that people think are going to be insurmountable are usually resolvable once goodwill and open communication are restored.

In my experience, there is nothing that cannot be healed if both people still want things to get better.

What about same sex couples? Polyamorous couples? Gender neutral?

Every couple is unique, though we all share the underlying challenges of being a human in an intimate relationship. I am open to learning from you how to best support your life together.

I welcome everyone who is committed to having a great relationship. I am delighted to engage with people of diverse backgrounds, ethnicities, gender preferences and relationship styles.

How do I find out about your couple’s weekend retreats?

Just go to www.RobinTempleTherapy.com and look under the “Couples Weekend Retreats” page to see the range of options, including a free 2.5 hour workshop called “Preludes.”

If we are separated or are planning to get divorced, how can you help?

With the support of a neutral third party, it is far easier to successfully negotiate issues that may impede resolving your separation or divorce agreement. I can mediate and help you come up with creative solutions if you are stuck.

If it would be helpful, I can also refer you to attorney-mediators who will skillfully help you achieve what is best for your whole family.

If you are divorced, I can help you with co-parenting discussions and decisions, keeping your focus on your child(ren)’s well-being – helping you come into alignment with one another about the issues that matter most.

Do you do home visits?

Yes, by special request, when someone is home-bound. For example, childbirth, injury or illness